Normally, the bachelorette party is a gift given to the bride by her closest friends (often spearheaded by the MOH).
Once upon a time, it was a night out at the bars, or dinner at a restaurant, with the guests picking up the tab for the themselves and the bride.
Then limos were added (hey, if you're all drinking, it's safer! Plus it's fun). And then spa visits, and last but not least, weekends in Vegas.
I've noticed that more and more, the bride is planning, or choosing, the party. It makes me nervous, etiquette-wise. How can a bride say, "Please go on a big out-of-town trip in my honor"? It seems cheeky. It's tough enough when it's the MOH who makes that invitation or request.
There aren't any helpful rules -- well, there's "don't spend other people's money," and "don't pressure other people to spend money" and "don't be a wimp and spend money you can't afford, just say no." But everyone has to sort it out for themselves.
How are you and your friends handling the bachelorette party?
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From: Worthington | 1/25/11 at 12:02 pm
While my bridesmaids have not mentioned it, I am sure they will take the reins to plan my Bachelorette Party. In my opinion, while it should be in the bride's taste, it should be done by the bridesmaids who are footing so much of a bill already to be a part of your wedding. One friend was married recently and the bridesmaids gave her a lovely local bachelorette party with a rented limo to take them on wine tastings in wine country here in Virginia. They then had a luxe multi-coursed dinner at one of the best restaurants in DC. She was thrilled and understood the event as the bridesmaids included women in graduate school. They had a destination wedding in South Carolina.
This is only one example of a fun but not over-the-top bachelorette party, in my opinion. I am sure my friends will do something similar, and I look forward to being surprised, and having a great time, by their choices!
From: Courtney | 1/25/11 at 2:25 pm
My only bridesmaid is my sister who is 12 years older then me and a Mom of two. So when I decided I wanted to go to Vegas I started just asking around to college friends to see if they would be interested in going. Then my best friend from High School offered to plan it and now she has everything under control. I haven't seen these girls in 1-4 years and everybody involved is going because they want too- no pressure and there has been two waves of invites. A casual message or phone conversation and then an official invite in the mail with the details. I'm paying my own way.
Since a lot of my friends live in a different state it's also another opportunity to see them in Vegas especially since they may not be able to come to the wedding.
Closer to the wedding day my sister will plan another Bachelorette party that will involve my Mom and some of my sisters friends in the town she lives in.