Posted By Grace Bonney, of Design*Sponge
If our wedding planning process was a Matchbox car, then this weekend we finally decided to wind it back and forth on our imaginary table and let it rip. We went from over 10 months of casual, once-in-a-while wedding talks to a full-fledged wedding planning extravaganza. Over the course of three days in Savannah we finalized flowers, food, the cake, our cake topper, music for the reception and ceremony, the layout of both the reception and ceremony, and just about every other detail on the list, down to the tablecloths. Phew. I’ve always been a fan of making decisions quickly so it was great to finally get down to business.
I’ll get to the rest soon, but today I wanted to talk about hair and makeup. As I mentioned in the dress post before, these aspects of the wedding (fashion and appearance) are among my least favorite. I don’t mind having a little makeup on or having my hair cleaned up, but submitting to the full process—and multiple makeup and hair trials, ended up being a bit of a letdown.
I made several appointments at different salons, arriving with a picture of my dress and the hair-do I was interested in (see above). I’ve never been a big up-do type of girl but I know better than to tempt fate with Savannah humidity in play. I thought that a simple braided up do (two French braids, tied in a loose bun in the back) would be cinch and that my “no-makeup” request would mean a short time in front of the mirror and I’d be out.
Boy, was I wrong.
I knew getting my hair done in the South meant there was a chance of
“Southern Hair” happening, but I figured that any modern city,
especially one with an art school, would have a couple edgy places
where they’d stay away from hairspray and overdone makeup. I went to a
few of those salons and I left with my head weighed down by at least
4,000 bobby pins, two cans of hairspray and enough “gunk” added in that
I thought my head would fall off my shoulders. I should have noticed
the warning when a woman next to me was having her hair back-combed and
ratted (sadly mine was too) and told her hairdresser, “Girl, you can never get my hair high enough.”
And the make-up? Let’s just say that Aaron looked at me for what felt like hours saying “Wow. That’s a lot
of makeup.” I didn’t realize how much it was until I was in the hotel
bathroom going through my second box of tissues taking just the
foundation off.
I never expected hair and makeup to be such a drama-filled section of
the wedding, but I’m totally turned off to the idea of having either
done now. I know I have no luck with doing my own hair so I’ll probably
go back to the salon that didn’t shellac my hair in various
products (see the photo above), but I think I’m a little too
traumatized to get my makeup done again.
I know the “rules” are to wear more makeup than you’re used to because
photos wash people out. But I’m starting to feel a bit like I’m living
things just for the pictures. Has anyone else ever felt that way?
Can I just say “photos be damned” and not wear a lot of makeup? My
normal “fancy makeup” routine of a little blush, colored lip gloss and
mascara feels like all I have the heart to do and I’m starting to think
I should stick to my gut.
What have you guys done? Has anyone done their own hair and makeup and
NOT regretted it? Has anyone given in to pushy salons and worn too much
of everything? I’m really starting to think I should trust my gut and
go for what feels clean and pretty on my face and hair.
From: Robin | 1/29/09 at 1:11 pm
I generally don't wear a lot of makeup either but I recently went the airbrush route and I didn't feel it on my face like with heavy foundation and it looked normal. It also shows up well in photos and covers any trouble spots (dark circles, last minute pimples). All I had to do was keep up the gloss through the night. A lot of Aveda spas do the airbrush.
From: ashley | 1/29/09 at 1:20 pm
Do it with the help of friends!!!
I had the same awful experience with hair. I didn't want "wedding" hair, and not only did the woman I tested with give me just that, but after an hour, I looked like a drowned rat. I ended up doing it myself and just practicing it in the months leading up. I used a small amount of setting lotion to help keep it in place, and a bit of hairspray and thats it.
I had my friend do my makeup for the same reason you hated it. I don't wear much daily and I didn't want to look or feel done up, just nice looking. I used Bare Essentials because it was so light weight and then just used a small amount of blush and wore fake eyelashes. Simple.
Good luck!
End result:
The first photo is me
http://pamelamarie.smugmug.com/gallery/5204355_DeyNA#315817958_abNh3
http://pamelamarie.smugmug.com/gallery/5700487_WH3yi#351574729_e3rML
From: J | 1/29/09 at 1:28 pm
I lived in Savannah for close to eight years and after my favorite hairdresser left the salon I went through trial and error to find a new place. A month or two before I moved I found Renata at JW salon if your still looking for someone or havent tried that salon. I was a SCAD student so I dont lean toward the big southern hair myself. I cant see her subcribing to the bigger is better motto.
From: Lisa | 1/29/09 at 1:31 pm
I'm planning my wedding for September in Portland and plan on doing my hair and makeup myself, maybe with the assistance of my mother. She loves that kind of thing and it would make her happy to be involved - plus she knows I'm not into makeup and hairdos so she'll go easy on the product. It seems like a silly waste of money for me since I'm wanting a casual outdoor wedding --- why look like a weird overdone version of yourself on the day to commit yourself to the person you share your most intimate moments with? I don't know about you but I want my fiance to look like himself on our day, and the same applies to me! Good luck.
From: Amanda S. | 1/29/09 at 1:35 pm
i actually did my own make-up for the engagement, bridal pics and wedding. every other time i've had someone else do my make-up it just seemed so overdone and not me. i did end up wearing a little more foundation, eyeshadow and mascara than usual - but not much (and i don't like heavy makeup either). and guess what? our photos looked amazing. if you can't find someone who can do your makeup the way you want it done - i say just do it yourself!
From: beth maher | 1/29/09 at 1:45 pm
Yes, some photography might wash you out a little, but that's just a matter of using a brighter lip gloss, and a darker blush than you're normally used to - not spackling on the pancake.
Really, the important thing is that you look like yourself, but beautiful, not that you look good in pictures. You want to look good for your husband - not your photographer.
Besides in this day and age there's this little thing called PhotoShop.
From: gk | 1/29/09 at 1:45 pm
hair - i had my hair done (in dc, alas no help you in savannah) at a low-key salon that charged me $50 for my fairly simple up-do. admittedly, there was still a lot of bobby pins and *product* (waaay more than i'm used to, but that's not saying a whole lot). i think that's just what they have to do to make sure your hair doesn't get messed up after a few hours. i'm glad i got the hair done professionally (but on the relative cheap) b/c there's no way i could have done fancy hair on my own.
make-up - after a horrific experience getting trial bridal make up done (i looked like a clown! so much bright lipstick! ick!), i treated myself to some nice makeup (bare essentials, stila) and bought a book on how to do wedding make-up. i think i looked pretty darn good, and more importantly i looked like *me*. highly recommend doing it yourself!
From: Alysa Richards | 1/29/09 at 1:51 pm
Grace,
I did my own hair and makeup for my wedding in October and never regretted it for a moment! I did my normal makeup routine (lip gloss, a little blush, mascara, and an extremely faint sparkly eye shadow). For my hair, I did a simple upswept bun in the back (it took about 10 bobby pins) with my veil on top. Our photos turned out perfectly. I looked like my natural self (which I think most husbands are hoping for...), and the excitement and glow of the day came through in the photos.
You don't wear loads of makeup in your normal photos, and those probably turn out fine, right? If you go the natural route-and feel like your photos aren't quite up to par- there's always Photoshop!
The last thing you probably need right now as you're getting ready to be married are more "rules" of what you should be doing, and drama because of these rules. Stick to your gut and do what feels comfortable and pretty for you- you'll want to feel like yourself as you're walking down the isle. Perhaps a talented friend could do your hair?
Blessings on your marriage!!
From: Gwen | 1/29/09 at 1:51 pm
I went for hair down in my Florida wedding - and it was fine.
You absolutely don't need any foundation if you like your skin. The only things I would recommend are mascara, maybe a little eyeliner to make it pop, and a light tint of longwear lipstick, with some gloss over it. The only thing that was outside of my normal makeup routine was the lipstick, and I only wore that so I didn't have to worry about reapplying anything throughout the night.
No icky foundation, pictures turned out great:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gheimburg/2657786086/in/set-72157603249525461/
From: kasey | 1/29/09 at 1:53 pm
grace,
i am with you on the no make-up and hair deal. i got married a year ago (in Charleston, so I hear you about the humidity). i had my make-up done by a professional, andi hated it and wiped it all off then re-applied myself before the wedding. when i got my photos back, i actually wished i had more blush on. i felt like i looked a little washed out, given that i refuse to go to the tanning bed. maybe i could have done a little bronzer on my face, but i didn't really think about it. so maybe do it yourself, but put a little more blush on than you normally would!! also, i had my hair done in charleston, and i loved it. it was very natural, but kind of pulled back and curled a little. no teasing involved!! i wanted to pull it back because the wedding was outside, so i knew wind and humidity would be a factor. anyway- hope this helps!
From: Alysa Richards | 1/29/09 at 1:53 pm
Grace,
I did my own hair and makeup for my wedding in October and never regretted it for a moment! I did my normal makeup routine (lip gloss, a little blush, mascara, and an extremely faint sparkly eye shadow). For my hair, I did a simple upswept bun in the back (it took about 10 bobby pins) with my veil on top. Our photos turned out perfectly. I looked like my natural self (which I think most husbands are hoping for...), and the excitement and glow of the day came through in the photos.
You don't wear loads of makeup in your normal photos, and those probably turn out fine, right? If you go the natural route-and feel like your photos aren't quite up to par- there's always Photoshop!
The last thing you probably need right now as you're getting ready to be married are more "rules" of what you should be doing, and drama because of these rules. Stick to your gut and do what feels comfortable and pretty for you- you'll want to feel like yourself as you're walking down the isle. Perhaps a talented friend could do your hair?
Blessings on your marriage!!
From: Alison | 1/29/09 at 1:54 pm
I am slightly worried about the make-up artists in rural PA. I might have to import someone.
From: brand-eye | 1/29/09 at 1:56 pm
go for it, it's YOUR day! i had a similar experience and looked like a tramp after my make-up trial. i even told them i wanted to look natural, not like i had make-up on. i decided to just do it myself on the day of and it worked out just fine. the pictures turned out beautiful without all that make-up!
my hair is a different story. i am clueless when it comes to hair, so i left that to the professionals.
From: Michelle | 1/29/09 at 1:57 pm
Grace.
Easy peasey! You have soft delicate features which don't require a lot of makeup at all.
Eyebrows: Groom them and shape them. Tweeze if necessary - start practicing now so you don't overdo it. Fill them in softly with an eyeshadow that matches the color. No pencil because that's too harsh. This will frame your eyes and provide a good contrast for photos.
Undereye concealer: Just a dab, enough to even out the skin.
Foundation: Scrap it. It will be too hot in Savannah and if applied incorrectly will look and feel like cake on your face. If you have spots or blemishes, cover them very lightly with concealer.
Powder: Your best friend. With a big fluffy brush, apply it all over your face but lightly. You might even try a light bronzer to give your skin some color, but LIGHT. This will create a nice canvas similar to using foundation but won't be as heavy. Try getting a powder with a slight glimmer so it reflects light in a flattering way and gives you a youthful, dewy look.
Shadow: If you want it, use a soft color or palette. But if you just apply a layer of face powder to your lids, you're golden.
Eyes: With your eyes, a thin black line with liquid eyeliner on the upper lid would be great. Add some fake lashes to the outer corners of your eyes. Apply just enough mascara to make your eyes pop, but don't go Tammy Faye.
Blush: Apply in big swooping circles on the apples of your cheeks with a soft brush. You have *great* cheeks for this.
Lips: I think gloss may look nicer on you, but not sure what you prefer. Easy to reapply, doesn't (won't) stain other people's cheeks or Aaron's lips when you kiss, and nice for the camera.
And you're done! It's actually all quite easy because you're keeping it simple and natural. It's you, only enhanced. Aaron will still recognize you, and you've given your features enough oomph so the pictures turn out lovely.
Go to Sephora and consult with one of their advisors. Tell them what you want. Have them show you how to apply all of this if you're unsure. Go home, try it, and take pictures of yourself under different types of light. See how you look.
Also, your photographer should be able to color-correct your photos if you think you end up looking washed out, but that shouldn't happen. Better to be color corrected (I think) then watch your face crack over the course of an evening from all the layers of makeup.
Just my $0.02 to relieve some of the wedding pressure.
Good luck!
From: nina | 1/29/09 at 1:58 pm
I am a make-up artist and want to let you know that you should feel comfortable doing your own, if that's what you want to do! I used to live in Charleston and did lots of weddings, and I always worked with the same photographer. If you are still considering a make-up artist, I'd ask your photographer who they recommend, do a test run and don't have it done through a salon! Good Luck!
Also, if you decide to do your own I would just suggest adding a soft, neutral shadow, it won't look like much in the photos but will make a big difference. If you want any advice or have any questions feel free to write and I'll help if I can.
From: Shannon | 1/29/09 at 2:00 pm
I just got married this fall and did the trial hair and makeup thing and it was a gong show! I don't wear much makeup on a daily basis, so I was traumatized by the caked-on look that they gave me, not to mention the beehive! The worst part was the dark brown that was added to my eyebrows... I honestly didn't recognize my face when I looked in the mirror. In the end, I did my hair and makeup myself - I pulled my hair back into a low side bun and added a gorgeous silk flower piece that was made to match my dress. It lasted through the entire event including the 100s of hugs from family and friends which unexpectedly can wreak havoc on silk flowers! As for my face, I'd gone to MAC a few times in the past year with the makeup that I already owned and asked them to help give me a new look, using what I have and adding a few new things. I never mentioned that it was for my wedding and honestly, they did an OUTSTANDING job and taught me how to do it myself very easily. All you need to do is purchase around $40 worth of cosmetics and the application is free. The day of the wedding, I just made sure that I was up and ready early enough to give myself the time to slowly apply my makeup and do my hair. (With enough extra time for a second take in case of a screw up!) Oh, and I made sure that mothers and mother-in-laws were kept at bay!
From: michelle | 1/29/09 at 2:05 pm
if you are back in sav before the wedding, try salon della vita. they are really great - kim swann is the owner, artist, and is very modern. give it a whirl if you can! (and no, i don't work there)
From: Sydney | 1/29/09 at 2:05 pm
Grace, go with what makes you comfortable and make you feel beautiful. On your big day you're supposed to be the most beautiful woman in the room, and if you don't feel right, you'll be visibly uncomfortable, and that's no good.
Do you have any friends whom you admire the makeup of? Even if they aren't professional, if they can give you a natural, slightly-more-made-up-than-usual, however still lovely version of yourself why not go for that?
One of my girlfriends at work did my makeup after work once (as she is studying to be a makeup artist) and put cotton-candy pink eyeshadow on my cheeks as blush and layers apon layers of foundation (which I hadn't worn before, and still don't wear) and my boyfriend didn't even notice when I got home!
Something I've noticed for hair, if you set your hair up the night before while wet, and let it dry naturally, it will hold it's shape more naturally with only a little bit of hairspray for those "fly-aways". That's what I did for the last wedding I went to, and my hair felt bouncy and soft all day (I did Dita Von Tease-style glam curls).
Are you wearing a vale? Did you try your hairstyle with that?
From: Gina Matarazzo | 1/29/09 at 2:31 pm
Do whatever you think will make you feel your best. That's what will make you feel fantastic and calm on the big day! I agree with the person who said your "glow" will shine through. It's true!!! If you think you'll be really worried about your pictures, get someone to help you. If you can live with the "risk" of washed out pictures or less than perfect hair, do it yourself and enjoy your day. The day goes by so fast! We don't pull out pictures nearly as often as we look back on memories.
From: Cadmium Red | 1/29/09 at 2:43 pm
I can relate to the "Southern Hair" experience when I was a bridesmaid in a wedding. All of us had our hair pulled back and wound up with the aerosol hairspray, puffy "helmet head" which we tried to subdue last minute with decorative barrettes. Same goes for our attempts at wiping off the caked on make-up that made us look like Cabaret performers.
My own wedding party was two weeks after a private ceremony, and we hosted a simple cocktail party. The air was thick with humidity which is not usually a friendly hair environment, but because I'm basically an earthy tomboy, I decided to do my own hair and make-up, and it worked out perfectly. I just gently dried my hair and lightly pinned it back with bobby pins and light hair spray and worked with the humidity instead of fighting it. For more formal events, if you don't feel comfortable styling your hair and make-up on your own, I highly recommend having a good friend or family member who you trust from a style standpoint, and who is good with hair and make-up to help you (as long as your intended hairstyle is not too complicated). This person will know you and your style well, and can help you with the more complex demands of your hairstyle and make-up, but not go overboard. And if there are things you want to do yourself, you will be more comfortable saying so. As long as you have a practice run with this person, you should be fine. I've had several friends who've had success with this approach. Everyone always says this, but it's worth repeating: you should look like yourself and a more natural hairstyle usually looks better on your wedding day. This way, your guests will be able to properly recognize you, and you will feel comfortable and pretty.
From: Callen | 1/29/09 at 2:51 pm
Regarding make-up, I think you (or a friend) could absolutely do your own. Take someone with you to a professional cosmetics counter, maybe take a photo of a look you like, and ask for some simple tips. I previously worked for Estee Lauder and know they have some specific recommendations for wedding day make-up, ie: they have a foundation that diffuses light better so you don't get shiny spots on your face in photos.
You're lovely Grace! Don't worry, everyone will be seeing your natural beauty on your wedding day.
From: Shannon | 1/29/09 at 2:52 pm
Grace,
You should really follow your gut regarding make-up and hair. If you do get hair and/or make-up done by someone else, be a little pushy about what you want done (i.e. no big hair) or you will regret it. I got married 5-1/2 years ago. I had decided I was going to be layed back about most things (including hair and make-up) just to keep the stress level low. I wish, I wish (!) I had been pushy about what I wanted. I hated my hair, they suggested highlights (not my style but did it anyway). To save money my mom suggested I have make-up done at a department store make-up counter. Big mistake - I said natural, not very much make-up b/c I don't regularly wear any. By the time I got to the hairdresser on my wedding day I was crying about how silly I looked. Your pictures will turn out wonderful, especially in your eyes, if you are wearing the amount of make-up you are comfortable with - not to mention you will be comfortable on your big day even when the camera isn't snapping!
From: Grace | 1/29/09 at 2:53 pm
Thanks guys! All of your makeup and hair looks awesome- living proof that I can probably skip the fancy hair and makeup salon trip. I just shudder to think about taking off all those layers of foundation again. Ack!
And I actually talked to Renata at JW- she was super nice (and hysterical) but she doesn't do up-dos.
As always, thanks for the feeback guys
Grace
From: virginia | 1/29/09 at 2:55 pm
you're young and naturally beautiful...let it be, but enhance.
yes, do your own hair...just takes practice.
as far as hints for natural do-it-yourself:
find the perfect foundation(you don't have to apply on your entire face) now by requesting samples from chanel, prescriptives, sheseido and maybe clinique. try it on at home, in daylight (you may have to wait 'til spring). my favorite was vincent longo (discontinued at sephora's) and chose chanel mat lumiere after great reviews on sephora. using a moisturizer is critical to smooth application. a cream blush roll-up, such as Woman, by prescriptives, is natural and long-lasting. sephora's lip fusion fat lip pencil (use as lipstick) in nude, lasts all day and isn't drying...rosebud salve or gloss on top of that. a gel eyeliner lasts through hot yoga (i use bobbi brown's), and is smudgeable immediately after applying. find a neutral light brown, maybe with some luminescence,and apply WET(sephora hint) on eyelids and use for a subtle liner under your eyes....lasts and lasts. mascara of your choice AND the BEST hint (from dancers): wring out a wet washcloth, and microwave it for 25 seconds...place it over your made-up face, and let the steam penetrate. it will set the make-up, and you will look luminous. grab some oil-blotting tissues for your bag, and ponds cleansing cloths(no fragrance, no residue) instead of tissues.
From: Shelly | 1/29/09 at 3:04 pm
I'm pretty modest when it comes to make up and have always always hated how make-up artists make brides look like a totally different person. I also think a lot of hairstyles look exactly like the next bride and tend to make girls look really generic.
On my wedding day I did my own make-up because I wanted to feel like myself on my wedding day, not some fake version of myself. I didn't want to look back on photos and go - "Woah - who IS that?". I just bought some new eye shadow and other make up that was a bit more expensive so it wore well and felt special. I'm really happy I did my own make up. My friends helped me with my hair and it was natural and comfortable.
I say go with your gut. If you generally don't like getting your hair and make up done, why think your opinion is going to change on your wedding day? I just don't get why girls think they have to look like a different person when they get married. Personally, I think your fiance wants to see you, not some 'enhanced' version of yourself. Some wedding traditions are there purely because people think they're supposed to do them - some traditions are meant to be broken.
From: Laura | 1/29/09 at 3:29 pm
I actually did my sister's makeup for her wedding! I have experience doing stage makeup, so we bought nice shades of gold, copper and dark brown. my sister needed extra coverage, and I just applied her makeup a little more dramatic than usual (she hardly wears eyeshadows and never does blush). Doing it yourself is cheaper and you wont be regretting a thing. Hair is a little tricky-i know I cant do hair myself. Find someone who will do exactly what you want. Don't worry about the bobby pins and hairspray-trust me you dont wan't a mid wedding hair fix, you just want to concentrate on the day! My sister's hair was very natural and kept her natural curl (she did a low side ponytail with a sparkly brooch). good luck!
From: yvonne | 1/29/09 at 3:42 pm
I am not a fan of wearing much makeup, especially foundation. I ended up scheduling an appointment at the YSL counter at my local dept. store after purchasing some concealer. I happened to get lucky with a good salesperson. She tried several looks during our scheduled appt. based on photos and conversation. I ended up buying only the products I liked and that made the difference. I had my friend do my wedding makeup and it turned out great. More than I would normally wear, but not so much I felt like I was wearing a mask. And, I looked like myself in the photos only better.
From: Danna | 1/29/09 at 3:48 pm
GO AIRBRUSH!
I went that way, it did not feel heavy, AND you can still use ligth tones for your makeup colors, as long as your face is flawless (thanks to the airbrush foundation) then you will still look like you, just with an ooomph!
Pictures ARE important, hence looking your best, but you dont have to look like someone else, I think you should work towards getting it both ways, it wont be easy, but take some time, test things out, and see what you like.
From: Ruth | 1/29/09 at 4:12 pm
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=33261815&l=86234&id=40611382
Barely any makeup! Did my own hair.
Go for it!
From: kelly E. | 1/29/09 at 4:18 pm
I had someone do my hair in a simple half up half down (I, like you, can't do my own), but I did my own makeup and was thrilled with you. I did a makeup lesson with a shop and was very happy I had decided NOT to hire a makeup person. She shellacked me. My husband did a double-take when he saw me! When I did my own makeup for my wedding day, it was perfect! Everyone said I looked like I was glowing, and I loved how it looked in pictures.
From: Nora | 1/29/09 at 4:50 pm
Grace - you might want to try Bare Essentials. The mineral makeup is really lightweight, and they can do it for you, as well. It would probably last better in the heat, too! Good luck!
From: amber of TheAmberShow | 1/29/09 at 5:14 pm
I did my own, but I'm a former professional makeup artist.
I can go shopping with you, too.
You need some sort of foundation, or all the imperfections, minor though they may be, will show up ten fold in the photos.
Foundation, a bit of bronzer, a medium brown shadow, a smudge of pencil eyeliner and a light coat mascara should be all you need, along with a lightly tinted gloss. You'll feel like yourself and photograph like yourself with a tiny bit of glamor.
If you need me to show you how, say the word! I'll hop on the subway and be right over
From: C | 1/29/09 at 5:22 pm
I was a bridesmaid so no trials for me and no choice not to have hair and make up. I looked like the archetypal '80s suburban prom queen - a sort of woven, hairsprayed "wicker" basket made of hair on the back of my head (I asked for a loose, natural bun), bright blue eyeshadow (again, I asked for natural and no colour), apricot shimmer everywhere and metallic pink lipstick (this was only last year!) I felt really uncomfortable all day and wiped it off as soon as I could and took out the 83 hairpins - oh yes I counted. If I ever get married I will either do my own or bring a trusted hair/make up person I already know along. I have not seen and don't want to see any photos of the day - though my friends are desperate to get their hands on some!
From: Amy | 1/29/09 at 7:15 pm
You can have light makeup that also applies for photographing well. I would suggest a tinted moisture that CoverGirl (of all places!) has- it's called CG Smoothers Tinted Moisture. It's very sheer, but covers just enough to even you out. You can't even feel that it's on. I'd get a pinkish blush- just for the apples of your cheeks and on your temples (which helps your eyes stand out). I'd do Clinique's Touch Base for Eyes under any shadow which will help any eye shadow stay all day (especially in the south) and then put a neutral color on top of it with a little pale color in the inside corner of your eyes. Do two coats of mascara. Then go with a colored lip gloss that's a little richer than you would normally go for. It's all super-lightweight. I wear all of that every day and most people think I don't wear makeup (if only they knew!).
From: jessamyn | 1/29/09 at 7:21 pm
I say, you don't need to wear ANY makeup if you don't want to! I totally second not making your wedding day all about what the photos will look like (and I am a photographer after all!), but what you will enjoy and how you feel. I personally have a very natural approach to photos, anyway, so never mind when my brides don't want to wear anything more than maybe some lip gloss and mascara. If anything, glomming on a ton of makeup will make you look more washed out than going natural!
I mean, I get why these "rules" exist - if you're going to wear foundation, you need to then wear blush and eye stuff so that you don't look pale as heck. But, if you don't need foundation, don't wear it. I think you should just wear what you would normally wear to a fancy party, and maybe step it up a tiny bit. If you're makeup-deficient (like me), then, yes, hire a friend or great stylist to help - but if you can't find such a person, then just do your best and don't overdo it.
I'm just saying, no one ever thinks the bride looks bad or has too little makeup on - and you want to feel like yourself, so I think you should do whatever makes you feel like the prettiest version of yourself.
Good luck!
From: Diana | 1/29/09 at 8:09 pm
I had a double wedding in Italy with my Italian husband's sister, and their mother brought two hairdressers to the castle retreat with them. They tried to put make up on me and I refused. In the end, it was a heat wave, and my redness from the heat made me look radiant in the photos (like I had a tan, even though I didn't), and it made those with makeup look positively pancaked and wrinkled and pasty. So go au naturel and wish for heat!
From: Gina Hayes | 1/29/09 at 8:11 pm
My husband was adamant that I not look "made-up," so for my wedding it was really important that I look natural and happy.
I tested out three different makeup artists, including a family friend, and each time I just felt like a drag queen. BUT, the helpful thing about the process was that I saw what products looked like the right colors for me and what looked horrific, then I bought those products and did them myself. I did a few trial runs before the wedding until I got it right. But I did wear makeup, and let me tell you the foundation made a difference.
However, I am a total glamour-puss when it comes to having my hair done. I just love it, what can I say? The most important thing is finding someone that will take direction. The first time around my hair was way structured and tight - I think I must have said "loose and romantic" about 50 times until we finally found the sweet spot.
Don't have any advice on the Southern Hairdressers, as I got married in California, but I do think there's something to be said for looking like you, but special. I would say find a friend who's good with hair and have him/her give it a try, or have a non-southern hairdresser do it and then teach you how to do it yourself.
Here's a link to how I turned out:
http://api.ning.com/files/OyuZptVegvyvlxqHRLZEku5JcyBB6wrU6abRjPHZA8N7mtBSqQvdu5jzFkQi9WTNSoQr-HJlNVCReXkf*ACFgW*1nHhxi3f3/bridephoto.png?width=183&height=183&crop=1%3A1
From: Grace | 1/29/09 at 8:15 pm
I'm loving all these photos of your makeup, guys! Thanks for sharing
Grace
From: Tiffany | 1/29/09 at 8:38 pm
I went to my favorite make-up line, Bobby Brown. I made an appointment for a sit down and trial at my local Nordstrom. Bobby Brown seems to know a lot of what looks good in photographs and natural light and Bobby herself is very minimal looking when it comes to make-up, so I trusted her staff would be trained in her approach too. Much of what you read also says to try and look yourself without drastic hair & make-up changes. I was fortunate that I only needed that one appointment with them. Eventually I purchased only some of the products they recommended for me. The foundation stick with brush, the cream eye shadow, eye liner and eye liner brush. If you do this, take your time with them. Tell the staff what works for you and what doesn't. They'll be very helpful, I'm sure, especially when it comes to wedding day make-up tips. I don't work for them in any way, I just really love Bobby Brown. Once you go through your own trials and decide what you're doing and what you're using, it's real easy just to do it yourself. I say save your money when it comes to helping someone do your make-up.
As for hair, I was lucky and went to my stylist, which I'd been going to for seven years. I don't know what I'd have done if I was a destination bride. It sure would be nice to take her with me, but budgets just don't allow that most of the time. I know I didn't want to look too different. I loved the up-do styles, but I rarely wore my hair all the way back in everyday situations. I went with a half up look. The style still used a heck of a lot of bobby pins but it sure did stay in place all day & night.
You know your hair best. You know how it handles heat, humidity and all sorts of weather. Just try not to look too different. You don't want Aaron looking down the aisle at you wondering if that's really you or some mystery woman he's about to marry. : )
If you have a beautician that you regularly use at home go to him/her and describe your concerns and explain what you've been through. Perhaps they have some recommendations or suggestions.
Another approach would be to rely on a bridesmaid or friend who's going that can help you do it yourself that day. My sister-in-law did this and she looked so pretty. The key is having enough time to test things out. It also helps if you wash your hair the night or day before and not wash it the day of. The natural oils in your hair help the style hold up better requiring less product.
I'm sure whatever you choose it will come together nicely and you'll look beautiful.
From: Laura | 1/29/09 at 9:29 pm
I was a Destination Bride with a huge wedding planned in Jamaica when I stumbled into one of Miami's top Aveda salons to test my options. I walked out 4 hours later with new "grey" highlights and a mullet of sorts. Tears. Frustration. And a lucky issue of InStyle Weddings to the rescue. The feature was Marishka Hartigay's nuptials and there before me was the perfect hair solution - hers. Casually swept back but perfectly elegant. I ripped out the photo and brought it to Jamaica and had it recreated.
Even if somewhere inside of me I ever believed that more was more in terms of make-up, I didn't succumb simply because of the humidity issue. With 120 guests rattling my nerves, I wasn't going to let them see me sweat my make-up off! My favorite MAC consultant handed me a shiny tube of their PRIMER and I was all set! This stuff is gold - it held up what little make-up I did wear in 80% humidity...
From: Elisa Bartels | 1/30/09 at 1:05 am
I was married 2 years ago and when I went into the hairdresser I clearly stated "Don't give me newsreader's hair." That's the Aussie version of 'southern hair'. She just laughed and went on to tell me that she had done the runway shows for Dolce and Gabbana (hair and make-up). Phew!
So don't panic, look through magazines and pull out pics of make-up and hair you like. It makes it a lot easier for the person doing it. Oh and have a good look at the other people in the salon. If they are on life support or have 'big hair' don't make eye contact and get out.
One final, teeny note. I love looking at my wedding photos so don't let frustration get the better of you. Have a champagne and start again, good photos are worth it.
Congrats
From: Jo O'Connor | 1/30/09 at 6:04 am
I recommend Laura Mercier or Bobbi Brown for really nice natural colours - ask them which products they recommend. Practise plenty before the day, leave yourself enough time in the morning and do it yourself. I did and it worked out fine = a good primer is essential by the way as it keeps make up on all day. I used Laura Mercier Oil Free. Humid hair? Can't help, I'm in icy England. Good luck.
From: LAK | 1/30/09 at 7:07 am
Hi Grace,
Best wishes on your wedding! Whatever makes you most comfortable on the day is of course the way to go. Just thought I'd share what I learned along the way in case it's helpful for you...
I was really happy to have someone doing my hair and makeup on my wedding day, as I, um, overindulged a bit at our rehearsal dinner (wedding stresses!) and this woman worked absolute miracles.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/84025537@N00/2583452215/in/set-72157605661135393/
My makeup artist/hairstylist wasn't with a salon, she was a freelance artist who also did photo shoots and the like and she came to my home (a definite bonus). Perhaps there's someone like that in Savannah? I found her experience more versatile than someone from a salon.
Regardless, a few things that I learned in the process...
1. FALSE EYELASHES. The individual ones. Don't stop reading! They sound super fussy but make more of a difference than you can even imagine. They are so, so worth it.
2. Deep champagne-colored eyeshadow. It's shimmery without being sparkly, neutral without being nothing.
3. I agree about not using conventional foundation but think it's worth considering one of the newish sheer ones -- Neutrogena makes a good one. While powder is great -- do still use a bit of loose powder -- it can be so matte that it would look unnatural in the humidity. And you do want something that will make your skin look smooth in photos.
4. Check out something like Benefit's Benetint or Dandelion instead of conventional blush.
5. Bobbi Brown makes a great long-lasting lip gloss.
6. I am so happy to have had my hair up because I didn't think about it for a second. You could put yours in a simple bun with your veil (if you're wearing one?) over it and not think about it for another moment. A couple of helpful tricks: use mousse (flexible) while your hair is still wet, blowdry, and you'll need much less hairspray (stiff!) because of the texture you'll have already created. And use hot rollers or velcro rollers before putting your hair up. It doesn't matter if your hair doesn't hold a curl or you don't want it curly -- the rollers create texture that make the resulting look that much better.
Good luck and again, best wishes!
From: karrie | 1/30/09 at 10:03 am
Hi Grace. I love reading d*s and thought I'd come over here to leave you a comment about my hair/makeup for my wedding. I was married in the south (TN) in an outdoor wedding on the lake. I didn't want anything fussy at all. I wanted an easy 'do and makeup and ended up doing it myself and I have no regrets! I went with a simple pony tail that was curled with 2 different sized irons and then stuck a fancy bobby pin in it (people have been surprised when I told them it was a pony tail). With makeup, I went with Christian Dior foundation and Clinque for eyeshadow and blush. I'm still surprised at how well it turned out when I look at my pictures.
I agree with Virgina's comment...go with your gut and do whatever makes you feel comfortable.
From: Karrie | 1/30/09 at 10:05 am
Oh, here are a few pictures if you want to check out my DIY hair and makeup...http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2999&l=e410e&id=513568300
From: Janna | 1/30/09 at 2:20 pm
I worked as a department store makeup artist for a few years and have done wedding makeup for about 15 brides (all friends or at least acquaintances). I also did my own makeup for my outdoor July wedding in Virginia...it was hot and humid! My recommendations: no products with sunscreen on your face (they sometimes give off a weird white look when photographed); foundation or concealer to cover only the redness or broken blood vessels; powder down the center of your face, a little bronzer on your forehead at the hairline and down the temples with one sweep across your nose/cheeks (I love NARS bronzers for this); eyeliner and mascara is a must--MAC's Fluidline gel eyeliner in the pot is great, just dot on with a flat eyeliner brush right up against the eyelashes; don't mess with lots of eyeshadow, just a little dab of a light colored shimmer right under the arch of the brow and maybe a darker shimmer shadow at the lashline if you'd like; whiten your teeth...but not too much!; and finish with pinky blush and pinky lip gloss that's not shimmery.
Honestly, it's the pink that makes the entire look. Lots of variation within the pink family...check out Bobbi Brown for great pinks. I personally hate the color pink, but it's great in makeup. Especially bridal makeup. Just makes people look fresh and happy! Don't restrict yourself to one line for cosmetics...try lots.
I've done makeup for lots of friends who don't wear makeup ever in real life. They were all grateful for a little extra color/polish to their look. Also, an outdoor wedding with natural light won't require as much extra color (no need for double the amount of blush a normal person would wear), because the flash shouldn't be providing the only light and shouldn't be washing you out as it would indoors.
btw, LOVE design*sponge!
From: Emily | 1/30/09 at 5:36 pm
We had our wedding in my parents' barn, in the middle of August. It was a sticky day and I didn't want tons of makeup feeling heavy and goopy on my skin.
The makeup pros I went to made me look sort of masculine (ick!), so I did my makeup myself with the help of a bridesmaid. (I think that seems to be the consensus!)
For me, the secret to feeling my best as a bride was glowing skin that radiated all the good feelings of the day. For me that meant small amount of foundation (L'Oreal True Match works great for me and is cheap!) and a touch of warm pink on my cheeks--very key. Then I did my usual "special occasion" eye makeup routine and dabbed on some lip gloss. It was inexpensive, light and I looked like "me"--not some clownish version of me.
As others have mentioned, we did go a little heavier than usual with the blush because sunlight usually washes me out. Here's an outdoor photo of our handiwork in action, after sweating like crazy at the ceremony:
http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e117/ekloveconnection/Wedding%20Snapshots/Picture045.jpg
When it all comes down, you'll look most beautiful when you feel most beautiful. And that's different for everyone! Good luck and best wishes on your marriage!
From: jrobin276 | 1/30/09 at 6:40 pm
I did my own hair and makeup and had NO REGRETS =) If you look washed out... well, that's what photoshop is for! Better to look nice on your day than overdone.
I have tried getting my hair done several times - prom, graduation, etc... and every time it had ended with me tearfully handing over money, and heading straight home to tear it all out and start over!
I don't even like getting my hair CUT for this reason; and I hate that they ALWAYS blow dry it. My hair is curly CURLY so OF COURSE it looks frizzy after it's blow dried - unless you smother it with expensive serum!!! UGH.
From: jamie | 1/31/09 at 1:07 am
Glad you found renata. I was sitting here racking my brain trying to think which salon she was at now. She did my hair when she was in Athens and I loved her to death. She will definately help you get the look you want.
From: Michelle Wigand | 1/31/09 at 1:33 am
The day of my wedding I showed up for my hair appointment and the girl who I was suppose to do my hair was not there (family death). When they told me "they would find someone" I knew this was my defining moment. I could choose to freak (which is what I wanted to do) or enjoy my wedding day. My hair turned out less than optimal but my wedding day was wonderful. (I like the pictures best which my hair is hidden :0)
From: Lizzie | 1/31/09 at 10:08 am
Hi Grace,
When I got married about a year ago, so many of my friends regretted the shellacked versions of themselves in wedding photographs that I high-tailed it to the nearest Neiman Marcus and plunked myself down in the chair at Bobbi Brown (the makeup I use on a daily basis- sparingly). The lovely lady there went over a few ways to do my makeup a bit differently for the big day and I practiced at home a few times and voila! A natural look.
I have two tips that worked great for me. Don't wear any foundation that has sunscreen in it. The lights from the camera will make you look VERY pale and I certainly don't need help in that department. My photographer and the makeup artist both told me this separately. Also, Laura Mercier makes this foundation primer that keeps your makeup perfect all day and I swear you can't feel it on. Just let it dry a bit before you put your makeup on. A few extra sweeps of blush and you are good to go for cameras. There's no need to look like you are getting ready for your 7th grade dance recital!
I did my own hair too, but I had a chin-length bob and side-swept bangs so it wasn't too difficult. I tried on SO many veils and I looked like I was playing dress-up so I got a pearl "headband" from Michaels that was supposed to go around a cake and it worked perfectly. It was probably the cheapest thing I bought for the wedding, ironically!
From: Lizzie | 1/31/09 at 10:28 am
Ok I am extremely happy with my wedding pictures, so here is a link to some of them on my photographer's website. I think the makeup and hair looked pretty good! Nobody got their hair done. My 6(!) bridesmaids and I had fun doing each other's hair etc. the morning of. I hope you like them! The whole thing was kind of a community effort.
http://sharynpeavey.com/lizziedan/index.html
From: Ashley | 1/31/09 at 11:24 am
I would love any insight into your Savannah wedding planning as my fiance and I are getting married on Nov 21 in Savannah. If you have any vendors, etc that you'd recommend we'd be so appreciative.
From: Nora Harrison | 2/1/09 at 8:32 pm
Do what you feel comfortable with. I did my own hair and makeup and felt perfectly gorgeous, mainly because I was comfortable in my own skin. You need to feel heavenly happy on your wedding day and not be nervewracked by unnecessary face/hair pressures. Your radiance and joy will shine right through and create a brightness unrivaled by even the best foundations and eyeliners. Best wishes and much love--N
PS: To prove the radiance of self-made hair and makeup on the BIG DAY, go here:
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/3613/4159/1600/sweet.jpg
From: Nora Harrison | 2/1/09 at 8:34 pm
Here's that URL again:
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/3613/4159/1600/sweet.jpg
From: Nora Harrison | 2/1/09 at 8:35 pm
Here's that URL again:
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/3613/4159/1600/sweet.jpg
From: Paloma | 2/2/09 at 1:03 pm
I had a very humid and hot destination wedding and ended up doing my own makeup! I was kind of scared about it, truthfully. I just made sure I had plenty of time to get everything on slowly. I also practiced my eye makeup for about 3 months before the wedding so I had everything (1 paint tube and 3 eye shadows well blended) down pat :3
Don't give up on your hair!!!
I think everyone needs at least a little makeup.. for under circles or covering up some freckles or whatever else..
The makeup was from Mac, pics are here:
http://picasaweb.google.com/lordjezo/Wedding#5230999063117465106
Hair I'd be too scared to do myself!!! Unless you're the hair guru. Maybe someone in your wedding party is skilled?
I did a half up half down thing, which i think worked out well considering the weather. They hair sprayed the heck out of it. I think it helps if you have a picture, and have them duplicate what you want
Hair Pic here:
http://picasaweb.google.com/lordjezo/Wedding#5230999727888220642
From: Alicia | 2/2/09 at 1:23 pm
Had a friend do both and haven't regretted it for a moment! Much more laid back- in my bathrobe drinking tea at my place, and I felt able to be honest ("I really don't like that, can we make it like this?"). Go for it- I'm sure you've got some creative friends who are good with their hands that would love to help you.
From: Milusha | 2/3/09 at 9:56 am
Hello. I was reading your saga and wanted to write in and say you don't HAVE TO do your hair or your make-up at a salon. When we got married, I did my own hair and makeup, I made my 9 guests take our wedding pictures and my husband and I couldn't have been happier!
So, please do your own hair and makeup and you will be a much happier, stress free bride!
Here's a pic of myself, husband, siblings and commissioner:
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=618546&l=d8ce0&id=674295415
From: Jessica | 2/4/09 at 11:40 pm
I had my hairdresser of 10 years do my hair for my wedding, so no help there. But I did my own makeup, with a bit of feedback from my best friend (maid of honor). It looked great and I looked great in the photos, too. Just wear a touch brighter lipstick (most of us don't wear all white on a regular basis) and heighten the rest of your usual look if you like. Looking like *you* is the most important thing.
From: Destin beach weddings | 2/5/09 at 9:53 am
Airbrush makeup does look very natural. I've seen it done on several of the brides I assisted and they didn't look "made up" which was a relief to them. You do want a little makeup so you show up in pictures even if it's a little mascara, eyeliner and lipstick. Make sure all your makeup doesn't kiss off, rub off or sweat off. If you're outside do an up-do for your hair. If inside anything goes.
From: cevd | 2/5/09 at 12:49 pm
i say forget the makeup but go with the hair. i HATE wearing makeup ... hate it. but relented to my my mom's wish and had it done before i got married. when i sat down in the chair i mentioned that i hated foundation and really didn't want a lot of makeup. the person applying the makeup said no problem, no foundation and then proceeded to cover my face in concealer. after i left i went home and washed my face, put on some blush and mascara, and then my dress. and i think the pictures turned out just fine ").
From: Abbie | 2/9/09 at 6:31 pm
I did my own hair and makeup for the wedding. My husband loves simpleness and I had a fairytale/storybook sort of theme for my wedding. I did a half-up half-down hairstyle and pinned my veil into the half up part, so that when he threw it back it became part of the do. For my make-up i went to the mac store and had the girl there show me how to do a really simple look, with very little make-up, but with dark red lips to bring it up a notch. She was great and gave me all sorts of tips. I bought the things I liked best there, and was able to do it myself the big day.
From: Carrie | 2/11/09 at 1:18 pm
i was so glad i got my hair done, but that's because i would have been stressed out that i can't do anything special with it. the makeup i could have done without.
From: Leslie M-B | 2/15/09 at 12:27 am
Since all of my wedding--ceremony and reception--took place outdoors, I didn't wear make-up at all, and the photos look great. There was no flash to wash us out; even the indoor photos were taken in rooms with plenty of sunlight.
I wore my hair in a similar style to the one you linked to, only without braids. I basically had a stylist curl my insidiously straight hair, pull it back into a pretty bun-like thing, and then hold the curls in place with a zillion bobby pins because my hair won't hold curl, even with a ton of product in it.
With all things related to my wedding, we went with simpler is better. A backyard affair w/table seating for about 150 people, simple catering w/excellent food, a good DJ, some hydrangeas hung in florists' buckets from my parents' deck, where we were married. It was nice not to have to fuss over the details, and I had a great time--as did our guests.
From: teresa | 3/23/09 at 4:28 pm
as a photographer....
Hi Grace, chiming in way after the post here, but as a photographer, and after reading that you may (or may not?) do some pictures before the ceremony, I am voting for doing your own makeup, and I am agreeing with the commenter who said you don't need much. I'd say spend some time at a makeup counter you like (laura mercier is a good choice) and us what you would spend on the application to get a really expensive lipstick, wear it later on your special dates - when else would you spend $28 on a tinted gloss? The makeup area at Henri Bendel is low-pressure, wear it around the store and be sure you love it before you buy. And the greatest thing about department store makeup, if it's not great in a different light, you can always exchange it.
Seems you don't like the feeling of makeup on your face - stick to cream formulas. There is a Bobbi Brown cream blush in "pale pink", it looks hot pink in the tub but looks very Renoir on. I actually picked up after seeing Bobbi demo it on Martha's show.
I also suggest you discuss your makeup with the photographer, some common wedding makeup myths like "no shimmer" are not always true. Also, you can let your photographer know it's ok to "groom" you (if that is something you are comfortable with.) That way, if you get shiny, he/she can blot you. Grooming as a service is common for men, but women usually prefer to groom themselves. I pack a bare essential "realness of concealness" kit in my camera bag for covering blemishes, I also love the included highbeam hilighter for cheeks and browbones.
From: kiki | 4/2/09 at 1:31 pm
I am photographer. Please don't let people convince you a lot of make up is necessary. Your photog, if they know what they are doing, will make you look beautiful as you are. This is a wedding, not a photo shoot. Be who you are not some plastic version of yourself. Your pictures will be beautiful. As far as hair goes, I was a ballet dancer for years, and for my wedding I opted for a simple ballet bun at the nape of my neck; and I did it myself
. My florist made a very simple piece from real flowers we pinned in and the result was stunning.
From: Tracy Wray | 9/23/09 at 9:28 pm
From a professional airbrush makeup artist in Charleston, SC to all the brides out there: the reason you do not want to use mineral or regular makeup on your wedding day is because you will look washed out in photos. The light reflects off of all of those little mineral particles, making your face look significantly whiter than your neck and the rest of your body. It creates a mask effect. I am a little biased, but one of the reasons I became an airbrush makeup artist was because of the fact that it looks beautiful, in person AND in pictures. I'm a bride as well (my wedding is May 22nd, 2010), and I absolutely plan on airbrushing myself for my wedding. And no, I don't do it everyday on myself either "(I am waaaaaay too lazy for that, lol)! It is a once in a lifetime chance to look your absolute best. Why not trust it to a *REAL* professional artist (and I'm not talking about MAC...) who can do makeup that will look perfect? Another tip: check out a person's portfolio before hiring them. There is a reason that the stylists/artists at MAC and the salon don't have actual pictures to show for their personal work. Hire someone who specializes in bridal. AND CHOOSE AIRBRUSH!!!